The Great Character Chase: A Collector’s Survival Guide to the 2024 Limited Release (Warning: Contains Mild Keyboard Smashing)

asdfjkl; – That’s me trying to process what just happened with Rare Character’s 2024 Batch 2. But let me compose myself and take you on this wild ride, because folks, this isn’t just a drink – it’s a whole journey that had me questioning whether I accidentally wandered into my grandmother’s kitchen during holiday baking season.

Picture this: You lift the glass to your nose, and BAM! You’re hit with what can only be described as the olfactory equivalent of breaking into a cookie jar. We’re talking molasses-laden shortbread that somehow got intimate with a cinnamon stick. It’s like someone bottled up December and added a proof label.

Now, let’s talk about the moment of truth – the sip. With a medium viscosity that coats your palate like a well-mannered house guest (you know, the kind that brings dessert), this spirit doesn’t just arrive, it makes an entrance. Dark brown sugar leads the parade, doing the cha-cha with shortbread notes, when suddenly – plot twist! – a lemon rind crashes the party like that one cousin who always brings unexpected plus-ones to family gatherings.

But wait, there’s more! Just when you think you’ve got it figured out, the finish throws you a curveball that would make a MLB pitcher jealous. Your mouth goes desert-dry, and then… HELLO SPICE! It’s like someone snuck a chili pepper into your cookie dough. Your lips start doing that plumping thing that usually requires an expensive cosmetic treatment, except this time it’s completely free (well, aside from the bottle cost, your dignity during the release day chase, and possibly your sanity while refreshing multiple browser tabs).

To the collectors out there still recovering from the release day: I see you, I feel you, and yes, that twitching in your refresh-finger will eventually subside. To those who scored a bottle: congratulations, you’ve basically won the bourbon lottery. And to those who missed out: remember, there’s always batch 3… nervous laughter

Final thoughts: If Martha Stewart and a mad scientist had a love child who decided to distill spirits, this might be the result. And I mean that in the best possible way.

P.S. – My lips are still tingling as I type this. Send help. Or better yet, send another bottle.